HANDS OFF: Do Not Be a Performative Protester — Be An Ally.
Showing up matters. But staying present, listening deeply, and elevating voices beyond the moment — that’s the real work.
Another protest in the books.
Oklahoma City. Hands Off national action.
It was cold. I was tired. My ankle’s still swollen from jiu jitsu. My infected finger wants to fall off. My knee won’t bend like it’s supposed to. But the pain that lingers in my body is nothing compared to what’s being carried by the people this movement is about.
I didn’t show up to be seen.
I showed up because people are being erased — and I refuse to be another person who looks away.
And after more than 15 years of showing up to protests, I can tell you one thing with certainty:
It is an immense privilege to not pay attention right now.
People are hurting.
They were hurting before this presidency.
They were hurting during it.
And unless something radically shifts, they’ll keep hurting long after the headlines fade.
We are all being impacted — some of us just haven’t realized how deeply yet.
Protest Isn’t a Performance — It’s Presence
I don’t like to take selfies to prove I showed up.
I don’t like to grab the mic to say what others could say better — especially those closer to the pain. That wasn’t my place, not unless I’m called to by others.
Instead, I want to be useful:
To document what’s happening.
To stay alert and aware, especially when others can’t afford to.
To help correct misinformation where I can for those not present.
To elevate the voices that never seem to reach the mainstream.
Not because I’m a hero, because that’s what solidarity looks like. At least, that’s what I feel I’ve heard from the voices that have begged to be heard for years, if not decades.
If You Don’t Understand — Ask.
Don’t let confusion be your excuse to check out.
Ask questions.
Start conversations.
Seek out voices that don’t sound like yours.
And when you learn something uncomfortable — sit with it.
Don’t un-know it. Don’t shrink from it. Don’t hide behind your what-aboutisms or what you actually intended but was misinterpreted.
Grow into it.
Because we don’t get to claim allyship if we’re only in it when it’s easy to understand or easy to share.
For Those Who Call Themselves Allies
This isn’t about guilt.
It’s about responsibility.
If you show up once, thank you.
But if you step back, make sure you're amplifying those who don’t have that luxury.
Don’t center your exhaustion.
Center the people who don’t get to take a break.
The ones carrying the grief and the risk — every day. Every day. Every…day.
We don’t need more performance.
We need more consistency.
Protest Etiquette for Allies: What to Do — and What Not to Do
Being an ally at a protest isn’t just about presence — it’s about how you show up.
Here’s a list to help keep the focus where it belongs: on community, collective action, and the people most impacted.
✅ DO:
1. Listen more than you speak.
You’re here to support, not lead. Let frontline voices take the mic — literally and figuratively.
2. Elevate the message, not yourself.
Share quotes, stories, and links from speakers or organizers. If you post about the protest, make sure it's about the movement, not your attendance.
3. Ask before filming or photographing people.
Some may be at risk due to immigration status, past trauma, or just wanting privacy. Consent is key — always.
4. Fill in physical space intentionally.
If you’re near the front, make room. If you see a gap blocking view or sound, move in or help others navigate. Don’t form exclusive cliques that block flow.
5. Take cues from organizers.
When in doubt, defer to marshals, speakers, or long-time organizers. It’s their strategy — respect their structure.
6. Share resources, not just rhetoric.
Post links to organizers’ cash apps, mutual aid funds, or the demands being made — not just protest selfies.
7. Stay until the end if you can.
Your support matters most after the camera phones go away. Clean-up, check-ins, debriefs — that’s all part of it.
8. De-escalate when needed.
If tension rises, don’t escalate. Use your body and privilege to help shield, redirect, or cool down a situation — without taking over.
9. Come prepared.
Bring water, snacks, signs, a portable charger, and info cards if you have them. That’s mutual aid in action.
10. Follow up after.
Ask yourself: What did I learn? What can I do now? Who can I support between protests? Your role doesn’t end when the crowd disperses.
🚫 DON’T:
1. Don’t interrupt speakers to shout your own thoughts.
Even if you agree — it’s not about proving you’re on the right side. Let people finish. Don’t “yes, and” the mic.
2. Don’t treat protests like social mixers.
If you’re standing around chatting and blocking visibility or sound, you’re a distraction — not a supporter.
3. Don’t take a selfie and dip.
This isn’t a check-in spot. If you’re going to post, post what you heard, who you learned from, and how others can plug in.
4. Don’t argue with like-minded speakers over tactics.
Not everyone fights the same way — and that’s okay. Don’t boo or derail someone because their strategy isn’t your style.
5. Don’t center your guilt.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed, sit with it — but don’t dump it on organizers or communities who are already carrying enough.
6. Don’t co-opt chants or slogans you don’t understand.
If you don’t know the context or history, stay quiet and learn. It’s better to listen than to misrepresent.
7. Don’t bring unapproved signs or symbols.
Don’t “creative interpret” the message. Stay aligned with the stated demands of the protest.
8. Don’t argue with police or counter-protesters unless asked.
That’s not always your lane — and it can escalate harm for others nearby.
9. Don’t post footage that could endanger others.
Blur faces if needed. Avoid tagging locations in real time. Think before you post — security is solidarity.
10. Don’t make it about how proud you are to be there.
Make it about the people who needed you there. Reflect, amplify, and keep showing up.
Being an ally isn’t about being perfect — it’s about being present, accountable, and aware.
If you’re learning, good.
If you’re uncomfortable, lean in.
If you mess up, take the feedback, do better, and keep going.
The movement doesn’t need volume — it needs consistency.
It needs people who stay, even when the cameras are gone.
What I Hope You Take From This
I’ll keep filming. I’ll keep showing up.
Not for the content — but because that’s what community asks of us.
This work isn’t always loud. It’s not always viral.
But it’s necessary. And it counts.
If you’re still here, reading this — I think you know that too.
So stay with it.
Ask questions.
Lift voices.
Keep showing up — in whatever way you can.
Because we can’t just dream big, we must act bigger.